May 8, 2025

I just realized the first 4-months after Carla’s death, I was in deep remorse, which was to be expected. Now I find myself in the mist of depression. 2-weeks ago I was actually a little optimistic thinking that my “CAP” scan would come back positive for lung cancer, but that would not be the case; just a clean bill of health.

I pray each day for guidance. There is no doubt in my mind that HE has a plan and my being around is probably key for His plan to come to fruition, so I sit around and wait. Tomorrow Scoots goes to the vet for a check-up. I’m a little apprehensive, only hope she’s lost a pound or two since her last visit. Yesterday I ordered a carpet to try to make this home I’m living look more like a home than a motel room. Very much like the area rugs we had in the Suncruiser Coach back in the day, except it’s a 6×10 not 2×6.Picture to the left was taken in August 2021. Amazing how much the world can change in just 4-years.

So, I will just continue to exist, day after day, in hope of a change. Got an unexpected call from Michael 2-days ago.  He has a major home improvement project he’s involved in that’s getting very pricey. After the call I remembered my thinking of His plan, so I called him back. In our previous call he did not even hint at the thought of asking for financial assistance, guess that’s what I like about Abby. She has not needed much help  over the last 20-years, but it does make me feel good when I can help her a bit. With my call-back I made Mike an offer for assistance, if needed. I thought it was a good deal, no pay-back just a little assistance in 12-months come tax time, but he did not think it would be needed, we’ll see! Time to go and take a Lorazepam before I fall over the cliff.